These 6 ways to trust again after a bad breakup will help heal your broken heart.
Learning to trust again after a bad breakup isn’t going to be easy. John Lennon once said that “breaking up is hard to do”. Boy, was he right! Having your heart broken can be one of the most devastating times of your life. In essence, you go through the different stages of grief; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. You’ll go through them all. It’s perfectly natural to avoid the whole dating world for a while but, when you’re ready, what are some ways you can learn to trust again? Here are our top tips:
Having a positive mindset after a bad breakup
Now, all of these tips should be met with this mantra. Having a positive mindset is the first step towards trusting and enjoying love once more.
Believe in yourself, believe in the capacity for love in others and believe that you will, once again, find love.
You are worth other’s affection, you will find love again and you will be happy. Even when it seems unlikely now, you will be able to move on and trust again after a bad breakup. Even if you repeat this to yourself in the mirror each morning, you’ll feel positive in the end.
Think about what you want in a partner
After a bad breakup especially in a new year, it is the perfect time to take stock and evaluate exactly what it is that you want from a partner. What made you happy in your previous relationship? (And there definitely were good times at some point!) What weren’t you happy about? Think of the answers to these questions and allow the answers to define your dating. Don’t put up with people who have the same annoyances you went through before!
By going through this process you’ll take ownership of your love life and will feel empowered. Feeling empowered means you’ll be ready to take on the world!
Don’t rush into dating
There’s been scientific research into the effects of a broken heart. It literally takes time to heal and get back to normal after a bad breakup. There are definite red flags to look out for which will let you know if you’re not ready to get back into the dating scene. Crying yourself to sleep thinking about your ex? Texting them regularly? Still talking about them all the time? Chances are you’re not ready yet, but you will be.
Remember, time is a healer, and that’s what it’ll take.
They’re not your ex, so don’t compare them
When you meet new people, it is very easy to compare them directly with your ex. For your own sake, try not to. Everyone is different, everyone has their own personality, and everyone deserves to be judged by their own merits, not by the standard your ex set.
Treat everyone as an individual and you’ll be on the road to successful dating.
Taking it slowly, this isn’t a sprint
After coming out of a relationship, especially a long term one, it is really easy to think that the next person who you click with is the one. Don’t rush though. Take your time, meet lots of people, play the field as they say.
Jumping straight into a relationship, or even a date, and expecting/demanding it be a long-term thing isn’t healthy or manageable for anyone concerned.
Look after number one – YOU.
Lunch Actually’s top tip to trust after a bad breakup:
Remember, you’re the one who you have to look out for. If you can’t trust yourself to look out for yourself then how can you expect others to? Take some time to care for yourself, think about what it is that you want and let nature take its course. You’ll thank us later!