Believe Us, Here’s Why Your Friends Are Bad Matchmakers
Everyone who has been single will be
able to identify why your friends are bad matchmakers. Don’t believe us? Read
on:
Our friends are the ones who are there for us no matter what. The best ones are there at 3am after a disastrous break up. They’re there at the weekends when we want to party. And, unsurprisingly because they want us to be happy, they’re there in our dating life. They’ll set us up and they’ll have a great idea of guys and girls who will be “perfect” for us.
It doesn’t always go well, in fact it rarely does. Here’s why your friends are bad matchmakers:
They
don’t know you as well as they think
You know how you have that really close relationship with your friend and you think you know each other inside out? Well, you know a whole lot about each other in a friendship capacity but not a romantic one. What you like as friends, like how you have that weird voice you use with each other, isn’t going to work with dates.
Your friends won’t look at you critically and unbiasedly. They’ll big you up to the highest degree and, probably, oversell aspects of your personality. This makes for an unattainable level on your dates, and will, inevitably lead to an unsatisfactory date.
Picking sides
This is potentially a sticky situation before it has even started. In an ideal world the date goes amazingly and you end up in a relationship with this person. But now your friend is stuck in the middle. Who do they give relationship advice to? Who is their closer friend now? What can they share? What can’t they share? And even worse, what happens if you break up? That’s a situation worth avoiding.
Friends don’t set up friends on blind
dates
If your friend insists that you go on a blind date by describing insanely attractive date but “you’ll just have to meet them” well that’s never going to end well. Your friend, no matter how much you’ve shared, doesn’t know what you find attractive inside your head. You’ll end up wasting your weekends and end up annoyed at your friends.
They might not have the whole story
You’ve gone through a
breakup and you’re single. That’s absolutely fine and, for the vast majority of
people, part of life. You’ve probably shared most of the gory details but have
you shared everything. Do they really know that you’re single because you get
massively possessive? Do they know that you broke up with your ex because you
needed more personal space?
You might not have
shared these details and that’s also your prerogative. But that means that your
friends don’t have the whole picture and could be setting you up with someone
who’ll cause those same issues to turn up all over again.
Leave it to the professionals
Don’t bother with your
friends, leave them as just that, your friends. They’re not professional
matchmakers, they just want what they think is best for you. If you really want
help, and don’t want to go it alone then invest in some professional help. Hire
a dating coach and get yourself some unbiased, dedicated help.