If you hope to be the kind of girl guys would love to settle down with, then this article is for you! Singaporean men were interviewed on how they would pick relationship and marriage partners, and some of these answers may surprise you!
1. A little Oedipal?
“Okay, I know this may sound super incestuous, but I would love to marry a woman like my mother – caring, loyal, and good with housework (because I’m lazy). A girl I’d like to casually date… She has to be nothing like my mother – I want to date someone more irresponsible and exciting.”
(Alex, 24, Student)
“I would probably want to marry someone who seeks to improve me and who makes me want to be a better person. After all, marriage is supposed to be hard work. As for who I would like to date, I would want to date someone who just lets me be most of the time – I don’t plan on being harassed to make changes to myself all the time in just casual dating.”
(Ernest, 20, Student)
3. Pleasantness vs. a heart of gold
“I wouldn’t really mind if a girl I’m dating doesn’t have the most amazing heart, I guess. She just has to be pleasant to me. The woman I marry, however, should ideally be noble, kind, gentle and wise. Hopefully, I’ll be able to be a good match for her then.”
(Jansen, 24, Marketing Executive)
“The girl I date must at least be coherent. My future wife, however, should be able to hold long conversations with me on matters of politics, for example, and formulate carefully thought out opinions. That’s the main difference.”
(Wayne, 28, Architect)
5. No difference
“I don’t get why we have to make a distinction between what kind of girl we would love and date and what kind we would want to marry. Shouldn’t you date with the intention of marrying? For me, I see a future with any girl I date.”
(Chris, 22, Student)
6. Love is patient, love is kind
“The girl I eventually marry just has to be tolerant. Tolerant enough to put up with all of my antics. The girl I date… Probably just good-looking?”
(Wei Hao, 21, Student)
7. Sharing chores
“When I’m in a relationship, I expect to do a lot for the girl I’m dating. I’ll normally be the one looking out for her, cooking for her, and cleaning up after the both of us when she comes over to my place. When I get married, though, I do expect my wife to put in her fair share of effort, so we can each have some time for relaxation.”
(Zhi Xin, 26, Founder of startup)
“For some reason, other men always say they want a mature and nurturing wife to settle down with. I don’t expect to be coddled or bored to death by my wife. I want someone exciting, and I expect my future wife to be the person I’m most fascinated with. Girlfriends don’t have to be that interesting.”
(Wesson, 23, Student)
9. Finally, one to make you go “aww”
“Whatever qualities I want in a girlfriend or a wife, I find in my current girlfriend. She’s the best (life) partner I can ever ask for, and I would love to continue dating, and to eventually marry her.”
(Benjamin, 29, Business Development Executive)
Clearly, we have some conflicting views represented here. After all, different strokes for different folks! At the same time, it gives every girl out there, who dreams of getting married someday, some hope. Somewhere out there is someone who appreciates your exact combination of qualities, whether in a girlfriend or in a wife.
Read an experience from real singles who have tried using a dating service and successfully found love!